Hey people!
I'm trying to write sheet music to that song the lyrics I posted on here, and I'm having problems. Either the piano feels way to slow, or the vocals seem rushed. I dunno what to do. Maybe I'll double time the piano...
Ah, hell, you don't wanna read this.
Hell, no one really cares what the hell I write in this journal anyway. So what's the point of writing? I wouldn't, except that I have basically no other outlet for this kinda shit. WHO THE HELL CARES IF AN IDIOT WHO CAN'T WRITE FOR SHIT CAN'T GET THE TEMPO ON HIS SONG RIGHT?! NOBODY ON EARTH!!!!
And why should you care? I'm just some sap. I'm a friggin' idiot who sometimes thinks his life is hell, when in actuality his life is good. The only things I can do well is sing, pull random trivia out of my ass, and do some math shit. I'd friggin' kill to be on Broadway, but I'm not even doing theater this year because friggin' choir leaves me no time. I wanna learn to dance, but I suck at it!
agh...
But hey, I'm only writing all of this because I know that no one on earth except for me actually reads these damn journals, and I needed a place to scream.
Yeah, yeah, I know, my life is good, I've got a girlfriend, I'm a middle class kid going to a good school, yada yada yada. But, see, I'm at that point of feeling crappy where reasoning doesn't work anymore, and a slap in the face just makes me feel worse. Don't worry, all you fans of Cheerful Eric. He'll be back tomorrow, with more of his song and dance, it's all comedy routine. I know, he's the one you want. The one who makes you feel good when you're down, the one you can rely on to be happy and weird, the one most of you consider to be the gayest straight boy on the face of the earth. Why does he act like that? Is it because he craves attention, and bad comedy and caring about people and making them laugh and be happy are the only ways he knows how to do that? I honestly don't know. And I really don't know why I refer to different parts of my personality in third person. I'm guessing it's to try to disassociate and distance myself from them, but if I do that, what the hell am I left with? That would make sense if I only did it to the "negative" traits, but distancing myself from "Cheerful Eric"? I would say I only do it to emotions and traits I'm not feeling at the time, but I've definitely referred to "Lusty Eric" while feeling extremely horny (nothing beyond what a normal teenage guy feels, you know what I mean).
Ah, fuck it. I'm going to listen to Queen, mentally bitch, wish Mara would go to a psychiatrist or stop being depressed, and bitch at myself for wishing that Mara was any different and for wasting the evening. Maybe I'll do something productive and look up Euclid or something. Have a good night, folks!